Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Finding normal again

This weekend was the closet thing to "normal" that we've experienced in the past month.  After a month long cancer scare with my mom (which included two nasty surgeries, one of which was just done at Mayo) that ended up in relief, a tubal pregnancy turned miscarriage, and numerous health problems with Ingrid and myself, we finally had, what felt like, a normal weekend.  We hit the memorial day parade- and Ingrid went wild with glee at the sight of all the "twucks", and then when her almost 2 year old "ants in the pants" hit we high tailed it over the The Village of Yesteryear, her favorite place to explore.

It felt good to grill out, enjoy walks, and play with side walk chalk.  Like maybe everything will feel normal again really soon.  Yesterday I had a blood test again and my doctor told me my HCG levels are down to 3.  Even though I already know that I lost this pregnancy, it felt like a knife in the heart.  Three.  Last week they were in the 200 range.  Hearing that is like reality hitting you again, this really happened.  I have a doctor appointment on Friday, and we're hoping for encouraging news, maybe it will be safe to plan for a baby again in the future. Until then....I will soak up every bit of sunshine with Ingrid, and enjoy every moment of being the mother of one.  

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